Imagination is the key !

Be aware that boosting your partner’s sexuality requires you to take all the necessary measures. In a couple’s sex life, more than in other areas, getting desire and sexual understanding to pick up speed is often a question of will power. Be imaginative and be sexier to get your sex life back on track—try unusual locations, surprises, body creams, candles, fragrances, music, massage, ambiance, etc. Show the other person that others desire you too by accepting invitations to dance or by gently alluding to the attention you receive from other members of the opposite sex.

- Reassure your partner : Free your partner of his or her old demons! That old adage that women who are too sexy and sexually liberated are not respectable women is still very present in today’s society. Reassure your partner! Both about the love and affection you feel for him or her, and also about the fact that you accept and encourage sexuality and free will. Sometimes it’s the man who isn’t liberated. Encourage him to express himself out loud, to let himself go.

 

See what eHarmony recommends to rejuvenate your sex life here

 

Some mistakes to avoid

1 ) Tell him what you want : Criticisms and sex don’t go well together! For couples, criticism never brings you together and is rarely constructive. But if there is one place where criticism must be completely banned, it is definitely in the bedroom! So be explicit. Tell your partner how you like to be touched, the words you like to hear, which rhythm you prefer, etc. If it isn’t clear, show him or her. And even if one of you forgets, just explain again gently. Sincerity is your best friend. Your partner can’t read your mind; even if he or she thinks you are enjoying yourself, he or she can never know for certain unless you say so, sincerely.

2 ) Express yourself : If you think your partner is attractive, if you like spending time together, if you like the way he or she speaks, dresses, or styles his or her hair, say so! The goal is to let your partner know that he or she is important to you, that you appreciate him or her. Touch your partner! If you ignore your partner or touch him or her only when you’re making love, he or she will quickly feel used, like a sex object more than a partner. Don’t hesitate to touch him or her in a non-sexual manner and to show your affection at times when you aren’t making love.

Preconceived notions

"Sex is not really what matters as long as the 2 persons love each other."

What you're saying

" My sex life is a bit monotonous, what can I do about it ?"

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