Good and bad attitudes

1) The goal of getting back an ex isn’t to ensnare them in your past relationship, but rather to create a new relationship.  Don’t talk about the past: they need to rediscover your personality, and you need to show them that you’ve changed.  For example, if you split up because of jealousy issues, show them that you’ve worked on this (without being direct, for all that); be subtle!  Also show them that you’ve moved on; going out, living life, time with friends…an active lifestyle is more attractive than living like a hermit.  It would be a mistake to appear as if you’re dependent (on him or her).

Need some inspiration? Check out photos of 5 celebrities that got remarried to their ex on YourTango

Some key advice

2) The wrong message: The good friend. Be careful, you know the proverb, “once you’ve chosen the path of friendship, you never leave it.”  You must quickly define your role and goal so you don’t fall into the role of ‘the confidant’.  You must make it so that your ex sees you as an object of desire to be coveted, just as it was on day one.  Take care of yourself (dress, hairstyle, make-up and self-confidence) without changing your personality, or he may not recognize you.  The secret: a better you!  Step 3 of the method helps you let the spice of your personality show through.

A declaration of love to get back your ex? Warning, danger!

3) Rushing things: At this stage, you mustn’t rush yourself.  Take your time and don’t start harassing your ex.  Your past meetings have gone well, don’t ruin it! Thank them for the good time and be patient.  After having asked for the first meeting, let them offer the second.  Discover the 5th step of the method to build a relationship at the right pace.

The right attitude: The best advice is to be patient: One mustn’t confuse speed with precipitateness.  Cutting off contact and then progressively reestablishing it is the ideal method which is the most effective for getting back an ex.

If nothing happens, try the ‘jealousy technique’, a very powerful motivator; it’s well known that “people want what other people want.”

And if all else fails, come to terms with the evidence that you really weren’t made for each other and that your soul mate awaits you elsewhere.




Preconceived notions

"If you show that you really need your ex, they'll fall back in love!"

What you're saying

"I want to see them again...what do I do?"

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The New York Times
A smart approach to love by Florence Escaravage
Psychologie Magazine
An Undercover Reporter Experiences Florence's Method First-Hand
ELLE magazine
An Efficient Method by Florence Escaravage, the Queen of Love Coaching, February 2007
Herald Tribune
How to Create Emotional and Intellectual Intimacy by Love Intelligence®
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